I’m all in. Never really ready but what time is better than now to be brave? This year is going to be one that is filled with great challenges and choices. If there is one thing I know, it is that I’m in it for me. Change must start inside; stirred up by the desire to reach newer heights that I know will grow my faith and confidence along the way. 2017 was full of great peaks and then valleys so deep that I thought I may just drown for good. Right before my eyes, I grew a brand that people desired and loved. My career was catapulting and I bombed. I ran into personal conflicts that I gave permission to tear apart all that I had worked so hard for. Pity broke into my soul like a thief in the night and I let it pick apart my joys one by one without a fight. I became broken.
I’m guilty of being a dreamer and believing that I can turn an idea into a success but I lack the patience for all the hard work that must be done in between. If there is one great lesson I learned in 2017, it is that I must allow myself the time and space to grow slowly. There is a marathon or a sprint and the path I choose can be long and rewarding or fast and short lived. But as with any great race, the body, mind, and soul, must be cared for to create the agility necessary to win the race. All three must be fed, tended to, and cared for in order to keep up with the challenges along the way.
So, this year I am sticking to one goal; living purposefully without perfection. I’m giving myself the permission to be messy! It won’t be easy and nothing will be handed to me but I am ready to face it. Through it all, I will focus on my faith and the Promise of my Savior. This year, my soul will lean on and cry to our great Savior. I know there will be times that I am back out at sea in the storms of life. This time I’ll be ready to use Him as my anchor! Until I can fight my battles in faith, I will remain in the same circle of chaos and that’s just not ok with me any longer. It’s time to realize that there is no other human who can make changes for me; I must be committed to see the real potential of my God given talents. I began Dear Gray Magazine from a place of “in between,” and now it is time to go back and nurture the wilting stems in my life. This year, I will nourish my soul.